Plants, the ones I have look AMAZING, but that is the façade I share to the world. This is truly the epitome of being pretty good at something.

Current APG (almost pretty good) expertise level: 6/10

I am not a green thumb, but I’m not a plant killer. I just am… selective to which plants thrive in my environment. But this is definitely a subject matter I want to get better at, because I love plants, and I love how they can transform a place. I just want to get better at keeping a variety of species alive, not just the “could survive an atomic bomb” species.

Meet my squad

My guide to not being a plant killer

• When in doubt… join a Facebook group – didn’t think my first piece of advice would be going to the land of the boomers? well let me tell you, I trust Facebook more than google on this subject. Here is my favorite group: Help with houseplants
  • Heres why its the best, pop in a photo of your plant and the issue your having and the experts FLOCK to help you. No more comparison of google stock images to your own, hoping you diagnose the right issue.
  • Also the grandmas – they know what they’re talking about. They will give you 3 probable solutions and the amazon link.
• Stick to what you know – As you can see I am a lover of a pothos plant. Its because they are truly THAT easy. Stick it in a pot, and wait for the leaves to wilt, when they do, water them and BAM happy plant 🙂
  • Extra note they are the BEST gift for a new house, they survive bathrooms, bedrooms anywhere! And the long vines are gorgeous to keep around or to propagate.

My goals for future plant motherhood

• Get – and dont kill – a new plant type: I have been fawning over rubber plants for the longest time. I want a beautiful tree with the big leaves but each time I try its no bueno.
  • Goal: get a new plant and actually keep it alive – big ask I know
• Successfully transfer a plant to a new pot: okay here I am just being like “omg I’m the BEST at keeping this type of plant alive” well let me tell you, they haven’t left their home pot like… ever. I have successfully transferred a plant or two into a new pot, but there hasn’t been major collateral damage in the process.
  • Goal: Transfer my plants without losing 40%
• Propogate successfully: I have tiny little jars with tiny little plants pretty much everywhere in my house. Have I ever moved them into a pot? no. Is it because I am scared? yes.
  • Goal: Move those suckers over to dirt. step 2: keep it alive for more than 3 weeks.

l’ll keep you all posted with these goals, and hopefully get my plant expertise from a 6/10 to a solid 8/10